love hurts, but it's worth it.

it sounds strange, but it is true.

there should be a class to teach about the feelings of love!

When i was in 6th grade i was "in love" with a boy named Bradley. He was so dreamy!

When i was in 7th grade, his name was Chad. Chad broke my heart.

In 8th grade his name was Andy, oh i was so young for Andy!

in 10th Grade i was once again "in deep love" with a boy... he turned out to be a stalker, but my heart didn't see it.

My mom wasn't really the best at explaining love and relationships to me. And my older sister would rather steal from me or beat me up than share her wisdom. So i was pretty much lost in the land of love and how to love and what it meant to love and be loved.

I think there are probably more kids than we realize who are unaware of LOVE. i don't mean the "i love you mommy and daddy" kind of love, but the "i want to spend the rest of my life with you (or at least the next few months of our relationship)" kind of love. To tell a person that you love them with those feelings is a very big deal. Then there is the love you create by bonding with a close friend. i never fully grasped love as a kid - i loved everyone! I told everyone that i loved them and didn't think much about it. i was a free spirit with my love and just gave it away all of the time. Now i am very guarded of my love and the use of the word love. Almost to a point where i do not share it enough.

Love hurts! and through the years i have come to understand that be it a friend or a family member or even in the past a boyfriend - when you put love out there and it gets beat up a bit, you lose part of that love and it is hard to get it back. i spent several years holding in my love and only sharing it with those that i truly felt deserved it (mostly hubby and my kid). But slowly i have been trying to put myself back out there by telling people that i care about - that they are loved by me, that they mean something to me as a friend or a family member. I've been hurt bunches in this adventure of putting myself back out there. But i am learning!

If only they had a class in school about love. How to love. How to be loved. What love is exactly... maybe there would be less pain in the world?

love always.

how true is this tag?!

we often push people away

just when we need them the most
and we tend to get offended when we are pushed away
so we forget to give those who are pushing,
love...
when they need it the most.

Sending lots of love out to everyone who is reading.
be who you are, because who you are, is loved!
xoxo

love is in the air.

sometimes in the mix of battle,

the battle of just everyday life stuff,
we forget to show love to those who are there for us.

Go on, shower someone with love today.
someone that doesn't get to hear it too often,
but should hear it from time to time.

needs . daily life

i feel so full of desire these days.
i need to day dream more.
i need to say, that's Ok for today...
and mean it!

i need some real connections
i need the whole story,
i need to listen to you.
feel what you are saying is real.

i need to good times. i need people laughing all around me.
i need to get moving... get out the door and go!

i need to be inspired by something great.
i need to take it all in, feel it, be it.

i need to make a change that sits right in the pit of my stomach,
and not just go with the flow.

i need to send out love and get it back. i need to stop sending out love that never comes back.
i need to be sure i commit to telling people i know that i love them, when i do love them.

i need to to see the great big picture before i jump again.

i need to find a way back to who i use to be. i need to keep
Claire on the path of were she wants to be, and not where
people are telling her to be.

i need all of my problems to magically be fixed by something great and wonderful.

what i really need is love... because in the end, love conquers all.

Love, glorious love!

Define Love: is any of a number of emotions and experiences related to a sense of strong affection[1] and attachment. The word love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure to intense interpersonal attraction. The word love is both a verb and a noun. Love is not a single feeling but an emotion built from two or more feelings. Anything vital to us creates more than one feeling, and we also have feelings about our feelings (and thoughts about our feelings)[1]. This diversity of uses and meanings, combined with the complexity of the feelings involved, makes love unusually difficult to consistently define, even compared to other emotional states.

I use to be more open to love.  At some point through my adult years, i was wounded to the point of closing off the idea of using "love" in any term to anyone outside of my family.  I tell my husband and my daughter i love them daily.  But if i sign an e-mail, i say "*peace*" or "thanks" and anything other then "love". 

I notice people using it when they send e-mails to me.  And it isn't that i do not care for these people... but "love"? I am not sure that i "love" my friends in the terms that i "love" my daughter or husband. Dare i use this word to just sign a very basic e-mail to someone?  Yesterday i tested this water of signing "love" on a message to a close friend who i care for.  I would do most anything for this person... but sign messages with "love"?  

Am i placing too much of a meaning on this word now?  I have read the definition... i do "love" most all people i know.  But i do not say it in those terms.  Can you imagine if you went up to a friend and said "i love you"? they would think you were a bit nuts!  As a kid i used the term very loosely, i loved everybody!  Even if i had just met you, i loved you.  Boy, that seems like a life time ago!

So through the years of getting to know people, loss, moving, becoming distant, etc.  The pain of this word "love" have taken their toll on my use of them.  It is not that i do not feel great admiration and care for the people in my life... i am just in a struggle to use the word "love" on an every day level.  perhaps i need help?

***

So, this morning... i grounded my child from the phone, the internet, video games, and all things that she finds "fun" in her life.  She is 9 and having some major attitude problems.  I have been giving in on so many things these days because my stress level just could not take the "fight".  And i think that she has taken advantage of it all. So today when her butt crack was hanging out of her pants when she bent over (yes it was a funny example to start with, but it turned to anger) i politely went over to her and gave her an example of how to squat down like a lady so that she did not show the world her butt crack (which included just explaining that a simple pulling up of her pants would also help).  She gave me this *look* of "shut up!" and got frustrated with me that i pointed it out and she just kind of blew up about this little issue.  

This is just one of many examples of her attitude these days.  So today, i broke it down for her and made her aware of how she has been treating myself and her dad.  I told her that all of the things she has in her life were gifts from us: having a phone - privilege.  Having a facebook - privilege.  having a blog - privilege.  All of the things that she comes home and runs to do and doesn't even ask permission anymore... these are all things that she will have to earn back with changing her way of talking and dealing with us (her parents).  All of this at age 9.  Boy, i can't wait for age 15!

**

having lunch with a "new" friend today.  I've known her for years, but we have only recently become more friendly.  Sure, i make friends just 3 months before we move away.