Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The age of beauty

image taken by Rachel Devine

Remember that age where you didn't see beauty?  

Remember when your best friend had bright orange hair, millions of freckles, and you wanted to look just like her, so you drew little dots on your face to look just like her...

Remember when you wore whatever shoes you wanted, heck forget about the shoes just ran out the door to go play!  

Remember when you did your own hair and dressed yourself at age 4 and all of your little friends thought you looked "beautiful"...

Remember when you would just say the word fart and you would giggle for 10 minutes... someone might "tinkle" in their undies... all from laughing so hard about a silly word!

Remember looking past who your new friend at the park had for a parent/family, and just went running around having a great time...

Remember not caring or even understanding what religious affiliation your friend had, you just had a blast playing with them and only noticed they were different than you at Christmas, but honestly it did not even make a difference because she was your friend no matter what her faith was....

Remember the joy of just having these kinds of friends who loved you just for the fact that you were the same height, age, and playing in the same play area that they were...

I've been struggling with the issue that, people on a whole, bug me! lol  Once you become an adult the innocent life of having a friend flies out the window.  People take notice of your appearance, the church you attend, the car you drive, the purse you carry, the shoes you wear, the people you know, and all aspects of your life.  I often long for the days where meeting new people was as easy as going to a park, running around from the swings to the slide and someone just joining in with you and just for that day... they were your bested friend ever.  

Imagine going up to a stranger as an adult... your in the store shopping, you see they are buying Organic too, you strike up a conversation with them over it and then follow them around and do your shopping together.  Uh, if someone did that i would call security on them! lol  It isn't as easy to meet new people once you are out of school.  Your guard goes up and strangers are just that... strangers.  They are no longer "potential friends".  It takes an effort to get to know someone and call them, friend.

I don't have many friends because i consider myself very private and i like to keep to myself and keep my personal family a bit private.  But the friends that i have made here in this town are the ones i have built the last 15 years of my life with here.  I know that i will not build friendships right away once we move, but i am starting to feel that feeling of... fear?.... wondering?... emotional pulling? (words are escaping me for how i feel exactly) how will i deal with day to day things when i do not know anyone where we are moving that i can just call up.  I have my brother and his new wife, but she only speaks a little English.  And my brother and i are close, but not BFF's.  It will be a new experience, knowing no one that i can just turn to to ask a question about the local life.

My new best friend... the Tom Tom GPS system!!  I wonder if it has a sexy male voice or am i stuck only with the "sexy" female voice on that thing ;-)

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